May 19, 2003  

Editor's Note: Due to technical difficulties with the Web site last week, this edition of This Week in the DMBL combines Weeks 8 and 9.

Good as Gold

The Arkansas Golden Falcons continue to roll on, putting together an eight-game winning streak en route to a 12-3 record over the last two weeks. It's not even the All-Star Break, and they're already inching toward 30 games over .500, with a 12-game lead in the Morris Division. Since back-to-back losses three weeks ago, the Golden Falcons have gone 14-5 -- and all five losses have been by one run! If not for their 2-4 start, they'd be on a pace to win a record-shattering 123 games. After going 7-6, the Vancouver Iron Fist lost 4.5 games in the standings to fall a dozen games back -- as close to last place as they are to first... Two weeks ago, the Carolina Mudcats were the second-to-worst team in the division and in 10th place overall. But after winning 10 of their last 15 they've climbed all the way back to .500 and are now third in the Morris, sixth overall. Falling behind the Mudcats in the standings were the Hillsborough Destroyers, who had won seven out of 10 before dropping all three games this weekend, while the Philadelphia Endzone Animals lost all six games this week after going 5-2 the week before. But the fastest falling team were the Columbia Rattlesnakes, who fell from seventh overall to 13th after losing 11 out of 16 games over the last two weeks -- the same woeful record compiled by the Tijuana Banditos, who are now 20 games under .500. Is it too early to mention that the Banditos' "tragic number" for elimination from winning the division is 76?

Over in the Hanover Division, the story over the last two weeks wasn't the Newark Sugar Bears -- though they did win 11 out of 15 games to pick up three games in the standings -- but the Phoenix Dragons, who went 2-12 to fall 13 games under .500. The Dragons had been tied for sixth-place overall two weeks ago, but now they're just three games ahead of the Banditos for the worst record in baseball. The Dragons can take hope from the Brooklyn Bean Counters, however -- two weeks ago they were flirting with the worst record in baseball, but going 9-6 (including an active five-game winning streak), they're now tied for fourth in the division... The Stanhope Mighty Men were a game above .500 over the last two weeks, dropping 4.5 games behind Newark but still holding onto a comfortable lead with the third-best record in baseball... The Honolulu Sharks have the league's fifth-best record, at 32-31, after splitting 14 games over the last two weeks... The Hoboken Cutters have lost three straight to cap a 7-9 two-week stretch, while the Harrison Rats actually moved up one place in the standings despite going 7-8.

He Said He'd Be Back

It can't be bargained with! It can't be reasoned with! It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead!" No, not The Terminator. It's The Thome-nator, and its mission is to hunt down and destroy opposing pitchers! Jim Thome won his fourth OmahaSteaks.com Batter of the Week Award by leading the league in batting average (.455), on-base percentage (.571), slugging percentage (1.152), OPS (1.723) and runs created (22.8), and was second in home runs (7) and RBIs (17) -- in just 33 at-bats! Thome had some stiff competition from teammates Manny Ramirez (.415, 1.168 OPS, 3 HR, 11 R, 9 RBI) and Bobby Abreu (.365, 1.046 OPS, 8 2B, 9 R), and Alex Cora (.375, 11 R, 7 RBI, 3 SB)... A very close second was Alex Rodriguez, who hit .321 with a 1.131 OPS, 12 R and 17 RBI, leading the league with 8 HR. In the running for some steaks was Eric Chavez, who hit .375 with a 1.319 OPS for the Vans. Chavez slammed 6 HRs for 12 R, 13 RBI. Meanwhile, rookie Bobby Kielty has suddenly found his power stroke. The switch-hitting outfielder posted a .702 SLG over the last two weeks, slamming 6 HRs for 9 R, 14 RBI. In the first seven weeks of the season, Kielty had just 4 HR, 11 RBI... Beset by miscellaneous nagging injuries and pitchers who won't throw strikes, Barry Bonds is mired in one of the worst slumps of his career, with just 1 hit over the last two weeks (.059 AVG, 3 RBI in 7 games), but the Golden Falcons still scored a league-high 90 runs over the last two weeks thanks to John Olerud (.375, 4 HR, 12 R, 13 RBI), Lance Berkman (.324, 3 HR, 12 R), Ellis Burks (.321, 4 HR, 11 R, 18 RBI) and Larry Walker (.306, 8 2B, 15 R, 11 RBI, 3 SB)... There's no sophomore slump with Philly's Albert Pujols, who hit .380 (1.086 OPS) over the last two weeks, good for 8 R, 10 RBI. He also is riding a 12-game hitting streak... Brooklyn rookie Chris Woodward is red-hot, hitting .311 with 2 2B, 3 3B and 4 HR for a .639 SLG and 12 RBI, while Geoff Blum hit .321 with 2 HR, 10 RBI... Another rookie, Mark Bellhorn, is finally justifying his first-round status, hitting .333 (1.169 OPS) with 6 HR, 12 R and 10 RBI for Carolina... Hoboken's Brian Giles hit just .245 (16-52) but cracked 6 HR for 9 R, 16 RBI... Honolulu's big three had a nice pair of weeks: Shawn Green (.333, 1.162 OPS, 5 HR, 13 R, 10 RBI), Miguel Tejada (.327, 3 HR, 14 RBI) and Jason Giambi (.261, 4 HR, 13 R, 11 RBI)... Tijuana's Vlad Guerrero (.407, 1.003 OPS, 11 RBI) isn't letting his team's disappointing year affect his performance, leading the league with 24 hits over the last two weeks... Batting average? On-base percentage? Stanhope's hitters somehow got it done despite ugly stats: Mike Lowell (.250, .265 OBP, 16 RBI), Alfonso Soriano (.233, .277 OBP, 10 R, 8 RBI), Derek Jeter (.217, .280 OBP, 10 R, 8 RBI) and Todd Helton (.188, .317 OBP, 11 R, 9 RBI).

Timmy!

Carolina's Tim Hudson was the only starter to win all three of his starts over the last two weeks, helping the Mudcats turn around their season. Hudson gave up just four earned runs over 23 IP for a 1.57 ERA -- second-best in the league over the last two weeks -- and struck out 15 to win the CENTCOM Leaflet Gallery Pitcher of the Week Award. The big right-hander has pitched better than his numbers (5-5, 4.30 ERA, 13.9 R/9), but his stats are skewed from three straight bad outings in April when he gave up 28 hits and 19 earned runs in 13 IP. If not for that stretch, he'd have the third-best ERA in baseball. Teammate Roy Halladay also had a strong week, going 2-0 with a 2.05 ERA, 1.00 WHIP over three starts... The Falcons' loaded rotation was dominant, as usual, with Pedro Martinez (0.95 ERA, 1.10 WHIP, 28 K in 19 IP), C.C. Sabathia (1.89 ERA, 1.32 WHIP, 17 K in 19 IP), Roger Clemens (2.14 ERA, 0.95 WHIP, 22 K in 21 IP) and Curt Schilling (2.86 ERA, 1.00 WHIP, 29 K in 29 IP) all going 2-0 over three starts... Brooklyn won 9 out of 15 over the last two weeks despite a starting rotation that combined for a 5.59 ERA! The heavy lifting was done by closer Robb Nen, who picked up five saves and a win in six stellar appearances -- allowing just 4 hits, one walk and no runs in 9.1 IP. He also struck out 10... Carolina's Jose Mesa was nearly perfect, picking up a win and four saves in five appearances. Mesa allowed just one baserunner -- a walk -- and struck out six in 6 IP... Trevor Hoffman picked up three saves and a win for the Golden Falcons, fanning 6 in 6.1 IP... In the DMBL's version of Survivor, Newark's John Smoltz is the last man standing. The converted starter is the only closer who hasn't blown a save this season -- a perfect 21-for-21. Stanhope's Mariano Rivera was far from perfect (4 ER, 2 BB, 4 H in 6.1 IP), but he did notch five saves to hold onto second-place with 19.

Following the example set two years ago by Ray King -- who won 15 games out of the 'pen for Stanhope -- Mighty Man Brandon Villafuerte is aiming for the single-season relief wins record. Despite posting a 2.57 ERA over the last two weeks, Villafuerte was 3-0 in six appearances, improving his season record to a league-leading 7-0 out of the 'pen. Villafuerte is a rookie -- just like King was two years ago -- but he's looked unflappable on the mound, notching seven holds and allowing just 6 of 21 inherited runners to score, leading the team in that category, with a 1.52 ERA and 1.08 WHIP. Villafuerte has more wins than all but five starting pitchers -- Arkansas's Curt Schilling (11-1) and Pedro Martinez (8-3), Hillsborough's Bartolo Colon (8-4), Newark's Randy Johnson (9-2) and teammate Tim Wakefield (8-4). Vancouver closer Billy Wagner is second with six wins -- courtesy in large part to his four blown saves. Newark's Luis Vizcaino (5-0, 2.80 ERA) and Honolulu's Ugueth Urbina (5-1, 3.60 ERA) are tied for third. The relief wins record is still held by Jeff Zimmerman, who went 16-5 in 79 appearances with the Vancouver Iron Fist in 2000.

Better Off Dead?

After seeing four starting pitchers injured over the last four weeks, Newark's team shaman Dr. Juju Hoodoo diagnosed the problem: The team was cursed by the ghost of Darryl Kile! The 33-year-old hurler died mid-season last year and was buried in the outfield in a touching ceremony on Opening Day, but his corpse was dug up and stolen by the hapless Banditos for a start last month. But Kile's re-animated body got pounded for six runs in five innings and was promptly released, and Newark's groundskeepers bought Kile's remains on eBay and reburied him in left centerfield with full honors. Over the next several weeks, the team's starting rotation was decimated by a string of fluke injuries, with Eric Milton, Mark Redman, Andy Pettitte and, most recently, Brian Meadows all going down with various ailments.

Hoodoo communed with Kile's spirit and discovered the problem: The righthander's soul could not find eternal peace still wearing a Tijuana uniform. In a black magic ceremony on Monday night, the remains of Kile were unearthed once more for one last start as a Sugar Bear.

Pitching against the Endzone Animals, Kile's remains -- his Sugar Bear home uni flapping over his skeletal frame -- pitched five scoreless innings on front of a standing-room-only crowd in the Cereal Bowl. But in the sixth inning, Kile began to fall apart -- literally. He gave up a 2-run home run to Albert Pujols and his right hand fell off. Keith Foulke and John Smoltz would come in and shut the door on Philly to preserve Kile's 43rd career win. Leaving the mound to a standing ovation, Kile tipped his cap -- and crumbled into blissful oblivion. He will be laid to rest, hopefully for the last time, before Monday night's home game against Stanhope.

Comings and Goings

The Endzone Animals re-signed Jason Johnson, a member of the team in 2001-2002, and assigned him to Triple-A Trenton to get back in shape. Johnson, 28, had quit baseball to join a short-lived Professional Hackeysack League. Philly also continued alternating between Paul Byrd and Andy Ashby -- for the second time this season, Byrd went down with an injury and the veteran Ashby signed to replace him... After opening the year with a slew of rookies, the Rattlesnakes -- now 10 games under .500 -- have tried to right the ship by signing veterans. The team recently added 2B Craig Biggio, 1B Tino Martinez and SP Livan Hernandez, releasing rookies Ryan Jensen and Carlos Pena. The team also signed Mike DeJean and dumped Jeff Cirillo... What have you done for me lately: He hit .288 with 37 HR for the Mudcats last year, but 3B Aramis Ramirez's slow start (.189, .717 OPS) and bad attitude cost him his job. Although Ramirez still shows flashes of power (.486 SLG), the 24-year-old may be the next Phil Plantier. The Mudcats signed SS Alex S. Gonzalez to take Ramirez's roster spot... Newark made some moves at Triple-A Dublin, releasing SP Brandon Duckworth and RP Braden Looper and adding 3B Bill Mueller.

Injuries

Tijuana 2B Bret Boone nicked himself shaving and was promptly placed on the 15-day DL. Boone, who was hitting .233 at the time, said he'll use the two weeks off to rediscover his stroke. Pokey Reese, a former Mudcat, Rat and Mighty Man, will man the middle infield in the meantime... Harrison's Gary Sheffield ate some bad mushrooms and will likely miss the rest of the week... Carlos Delgado, who had just been on a two-week vacation to Egypt, will be held indefinitely at Guantanamo Bay as a suspected terrorist. Columbia's Sidney Ponson, a representative for the DMBL player's union, will miss some time as he tries to convince John Ashcroft that it really is Delgado, not a highly trained Al-Qaida operative posing as the Hillsborough first baseman.

TWIB may have Ozzie Smith, but we have the better Smith! Zane Smith, former pitcher for the San Antonio Slingers and Sacramento Seahawks, now writes this column exclusively for the Diamond Mind Baseball League. Click Here for past articles.